Double-Nuts!

No, this is not some weird medical condition found only in the backwoods of West Virginia. It is a dream hand found in Omaha Hi-Lo where you, you lucky devil, have managed to put together the BEST possible high hand -AND- the BEST possible low hand. Voila! Double-Nuts!


It is one of those hands that is guaranteed to suck all the air out of your opponents lungs and leave him muttering indiscernible syllables and often followed by vomiting and urinating on oneself. Yes sir.... there's nothing quite like it!


Especially when you can deliver those words to someone like.... the Juice, for instance.... or Elli. Unlike tricky-ricky, it is very unusual for me to catch this rare beast. This past Tuesday night.... twice! Once against the always aggressive Elli and the hand went some like this:


I peer down at JJA2.... I typically find myself muttering to myself something like "Jack, 3, 4.... Jack, 3, 4" and of course the flop usually brings 996 or something close... Not tonight!


The flop: J, J, 7 - since I'm in early position, I want to let someone catch up and maybe even succeed in getting all of our chippies in for a mass quartering, I just check, hoping that someone else will bet. No such luck! No one bets. The turn brings a 6 and two to the flush so I bet out a little hoping that someone is chasing the straight, the flush or the low. Not much, just $60 and only Elli calls. The river brings in the low with a 4 and puts a flush on the board. I bet $150 and Elli just smooth calls.... and I turn over the quad Jacks and the nut low. He made a straight on the river and all he could say for about 15 minutes was "wow!" I agree... Wow!


The second hand came against Bart, a new comer to the Juice's game. He has been catching pocket aces all night and raising with them pre-flop. This strategy may work in some games, but it'll only work here if what you are seeking is callers. He is on the button and raises it another $50 and everyone at the table calls and although the Juice was in Vegas, he texted to Mikey that he called too. I've got one of my favorite little sneaky hands... Ac, 3s, 5c, 7s. The flop was the 2s, 3c, 4s. Nice.... so I just check "knowing" that the Bart-miester would be coming forth with a follow-up bet and sure enough... he bets $100. Dean had just received some kiddy-porn on his phone so he folded right away, grabbed some baby lotion and some paper towels and headed off to the little boys room, I decided to narrow the field a little and raised another $150. Everyone folded to Bart and he calls. The turn was a beautiful 6d so I pushed an amount that would put Bart all-in into the middle, about $250 more and he almost beat me into the middle with the chips. The river was a meaningless Jack and made the "double-nuts." My low was 2,3,4 from the board and the A, 5 from my hand. My high was the 3,4,6 from the board and the 5, 7 from my hand! Whee! Double-nuts!


If it ever does become a medical condition.... sign me up!


Let the suck outs begin!