My WSOP Experience

Greetings everyone in Carolina-land. And beyond. Just wanted to jot a few thoughts down for the entertainment or disgust of the board. Whichever. Both feelings rot your stomach like an "animal style" In-and-Out burger, so who gives a rats petute whether this post bores you or makes you take your manhood in your hand. I sure don't ;)

Ever since I've moved to Atlanta and been bitch-slapped by the woman I was dating (two weeks after moving) I decided I was going to play in a couple WSOP events. See... and I'm sure many of you have this identical argument with your significant other or friends... we had this constant bickering about how poker was gambling and how it wasn't approved of. My advice? Chop HER up "animal style" and sacrifice her carnage to the poker gods for better luck at having the winning hand hold up. So since its end, I swore I was going to play... Oh, and in case she's reading this, I also have the lesbian porn on automatic loop... deal with it.

So Mr. Shirk gave me a place to crash on the floor of a Binion hotel room. The kind of place even a $6 hooker would have been leery of. I wish I had taken 6 valium and stayed there for 3 days instead of venture out to play cards. But I had skipped the step of worshipping the poker gods with the bloody remnants of my ex. So they took it out on me. Or rather, I played like a donk. The ultimate eeyore. It's like I forgot how to play. I must have bluffed off $1000 in the first night. Lesson to self: Just because you haven't played in 3 months doesn't mean you have to get into every pot and win every hand. Lesson #2 to self: The Juice's style of play doesn't translate well to some 2-5 NL games.

I entered a $550 tourney at the Venetian, and actually played well. Couldn't get too many hands, but lasted about halfway through when I pushed all in with 42s against a late-position raiser who had done alot of it. Of course AA was what he flipped over.

The PLO8 tourney at Binions was an effort in retardedness for me. I played semi well for a very short time, and pulled 2 hands in a row that left me with 20+ outs to the nuts after the flop. Of course, nothing catches either time. It reminded me of the 7 times in a row that the roullette table hit Red while a drunk Shirk and I were firing chips at the leatherfaced fake-hair twig of a pit boss flirted with us. She actually brought out a paddle.

So a gallon of bad play and a little bad luck, I was ready to take on the $1500 PLO8 event. Joe Hatchem's Aussie friend was on my right, and Hatchem kept coming over to our table until I broke his friend. Cornflake Turner was ironically at the table on my left. I played well. Very well. Stole some small pots. Made some great plays. Folded hands that I would have called $140 with preflop in Juice's game, but would just get me in trouble in a tourney. Played outstanding. Until the hand. THE hand.

QcQx2c4x. Mildly interesting at this table. Blinds $75/150. I have about $6-7K (starting and average were 3K) after a few good hands. I'm in late position, and after a limper I call. The SB raises pot, to like $600. He's got about $13K in chips, and is easily the big stack at the table. I'm probably in 3rd place in stack size, but way above average. Implied odds are nice, so I make the call to spike something. Everyone else folds.

Lo and behold. Qh5c7c flops.

Tell me I'm not jizzing my pants against the big stack when he leads out betting pot.

What do I do? I almost want to trap him and see a cheap turn to make sure things are golden and get more chips. Nah... the pot is about $3000 after his pot bet, and I'm happy with that right now. So I repot.

He re-pots.

Uh oh.

We get all the chips in.

He shows AhAx2x9h. I've got him crippled.

If he catches an A, I get half the pot for the low. If I catch a club, I'm almost a lock. Things were marvelous. Alas... you know what's coming...

Runner runner heart heart, I can't remember if they were low or not, but his low had me beat. Does it really matter? Ugh. What a cheap way to get busted out of the biggest tourney I've ever played in. DANGIT!

All in all, I had a wonderful time losing a ton of hard-earned cash. I saw so many pros, your head would spin if I listed them all. Rick and I had alot of fun watching Shirk instigate a bunch of fights at his table with Marcel Luske. The floorman must have made a trip over about 5 times while we watched. And John was always quiet as a churchmouse when he did.

Right ;)

It was a great trip though despite the bad cards. Great to see some familiar faces and to be in the middle of it all. To experience an event and play like I'm capable of, and know that I'd have had a *ton* of chips had I won that hand. Could have ridden those a long way. Maybe next year.

In the meantime... the lesson learned is... if your girl doesn't like you playing poker... make sure you dump her ass in time for the WSOP. I'll see you there next year.